“Catherine, you sounded like you’d been dragged off the street to audition and had never acted professionally before.”
This was the feedback given to me earlier this year in an auditioning for camera class. In auditions, before cracking on with the scene, you’re often asked to film a ‘slate’. Sometimes this involves simply stating your name and agent, but on this occasion, I was asked the dreaded open question;
“So…tell us about yourself”
Gulp.
“Errr…well…ummm…gosh…errr…”
Cue blind panic and a nervous laugh.
Be careful Catherine, I thought. You don’t want to sound arrogant. You want to come across as someone who is easy to work with, a team player, not a nightmare. Don’t over-egg your experience.
“Well…umm…I’m really grateful to be here… and this is such a fab opportunity…. umm… errr…”
Oh dear. I was so desperate not to sound arrogant that my response went completely the other way. It was woolly, weak and lacking in any kind of confidence at all (and yes, the irony is not lost on me – I help people communicate with confidence for a living but wasn’t able to communicate with confidence myself. Oh dear indeed.)
If that had been a real-world audition, it’s unlikely I’d have booked the job, regardless how good my read of the scene was. And yet I know that it is possible to talk about your experience and showcase your expertise without sounding arrogant. And I know that it’s those confident, comfortable-in- their-own-skin people that will book the job. In much the same way that it’s those confident, comfortable-in-their-own-skin / know-what-they-offer agencies that will get the client to sign on the dotted line and win more work.
In an agency sales context, it’s crucial that we understand how to tread that fine line between confidence and arrogance. I’m often quoting the What Clients Think 2024 Survey* which found that:
“71% of pitches are lost because of softer factors over and above harder factors.”
The softer factors are the team, personal chemistry, a presentation that flows and confidence but not arrogance.
So how can we ensure we project confidence when dealing with clients, both throughout the pitch process and in everyday agency life, without tipping over into arrogance?
I think it’s helpful to first dig deeper into the definitions and etymology of the words confidence and arrogance.
Confidence comes from the Latin, con fidere, which means with trust. It involves self-assurance; an understanding and belief in one’s own abilities or qualities.
Arrogance comes from the Latin, arrogare, meaning to claim for oneself or to assume. It involves an exaggerated sense of one’s own importance and abilities.
It’s easy to confuse arrogance with confidence because often there’s only a thin line between the two. While both stem from one’s belief in oneself, arrogance is a result of an exaggerated sense of self, while confidence is not.
Arrogance is seen as a negative trait, an offensive display of superiority or self-importance. Arrogant people will rarely own up to their mistakes, often brag about their abilities and achievements, will try to demean others and aren’t good team players. It’s worth remembering that arrogance often stems from insecurities and fear.
In contrast, confidence is seen as a positive trait. Confident people aren’t afraid to admit when they’re wrong and are willing to learn from their mistakes, they have no need for bragging and make excellent team leaders. Confidence stems from self-assurance, a belief in one’s abilities.
So what steps can we take to avoid coming across as an arrogant agency when dealing with prospects and clients? Here are 5 points to consider:
- Remember it’s not all about you – it’s easy to slip into broadcast mode, have a sole focus on yourselves and wang on about all the fabulous awards you’ve won and the big clients you’ve worked with. Remember that you are not the hero, the client is.
- Be curious and ask questions – an agency that focuses solely on themselves doesn’t allow time for questions. This can give the impression that you think you have all the answers. Asking questions (and really listening to the answers) shows a willingness to learn and collaborate. Use your curiosity to ask questions. They can help you gather insights, discover needs, analyse objectives, dig into objections, overcome obstacles and understand your client’s thoughts, feelings and attitudes.
- Tailor the conversation around a brand’s business– the focus should be on the client and the challenges they face within that category.
- Don’t make assumptions – a factor of confidence is admitting that you don’t always have the answer but you’re willing to work with others to find the solution. An arrogant agency will make assumptions about a business they know very little about without researching it first.
- Ensure you and your team demonstrate the behaviours of gravitas – the way you express what you know via groundedness, a clear, resonant voice, speaking concisely without fillers, listening fully and having poise under pressure. For me, gravitas is the key that unlocks confident communication without tipping into arrogance, largely because it allows you to be entirely yourself yet still have the power to command the respect and trust of others. It’s about expressing your knowledge, purpose and passion in a way that resonates with others and above all It’s about serving a purpose that’s bigger than you. Gravitas isn’t self-serving. Rather than focusing on the need to sell sell sell, focus instead on what the client needs. What will be of most value to them?
Much like arrogant people, arrogant agencies will only see things their way. Confident agencies will listen to the client’s perspective and understand their challenges and pain points. Confident agencies aren’t afraid to challenge and they’re certainly not woolly or weak. They know the value they offer and they communicate that value with gravitas, sounding conversational and expert.
After my disastrous first attempt, I’ve now mastered the art of a confident, but not arrogant, slate for my on-camera auditions. Turns out it’s all about being yourself, being comfortable in your own skin, knowing the value you bring, allowing your personality to shine through and clearly and concisely sharing some of your recent and most relevant acting credits….without wanging on about yourself for too long.
So… much the same as in agency new business then.
*Up To The Light / What Clients Think Survey 2024
**If you and your team would like some help to find and build your gravitas so you can communicate with more confidence, influence and authority with clients and prospects, drop me a line. I offer bitesize, half-day and full-day sessions.